Who Is The Penning Panda?

Pops tells me “You are the King of yourself.” Now I tell you: “You are the King (or Queen) of yourself… Don’t let your head cloud your heart, let your heart clear your mind…”

So here’s my obligatory “About Me” section.  Apparently to make your blog somewhat legit you need to have one of these.  There are links spread all throughout this page, I encourage you to check them out.  I’m a quote junky, be it from others or my own random quotes.  To understand the, and at times to decipher, kaleidoscope mind I posses we’ll start off here.

“…If everything were black and white, there wouldn’t be so many colors in this world…” – Penning Panda

In short, the Penning Panda lives by three things:

  1. You are the King of yourself.
  2. Making bad choices with good people.
  3. True craziness is hard to find. But when you find it, embrace it.

Think big. Do gigantic. Enjoy the simplicities of life.

The picture above is of the majestic Deception Pass bridge, taken by yours truly.

He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

I have too many thoughts flowing through my head.  Instead of talking to myself or thinking alone, this blog is an attempt to share them with my peeps.  Feel free to bash, agree, laugh, or shake your head.  I hope you enjoy this blog or hate it.  But thanks for visiting.

“We wanderers, ever seeking the lonelier way, begin no day where we have ended another day; and no sunrise finds us where sunset left us. Even while the earth sleeps we travel. We are the seeds of the tenacious plant, and it is in our ripeness and our fullness of heart that we are given to the wind and are scattered.” – The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

I’m doing what I do best, keeping it real and staying me.  If that’s too confusing I’ll defer to Friedrich Nietzsche’s “Thus Spoke Zarathustra.” Key in on the chapter “The Stillest Hour.”

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”Ralph Waldo Emerson

The key to life is Pursuit of Passion. Passion in everything you do and breathe. Your path is your passion.

I was raised in Oak Harbor on an island.  I rock a tattoo of Whidbey Island and my version of a Mexican Eclipse on my right shoulder.  If you know of the OHP, well knowledge is half the battle GI Joe or Jane.

I like to eat meat, but I haven’t worn fur… yet.  I bump fists.  Give hugs.  Have a few (dozen) secret handshakes.  And I’m in a cadre with its own gang hand sign.  I don’t have any brothers but I’d die for my bretheren in the OHP.

I actually graduated from a private Jesuit high school.  Yea, if you knew me you wouldn’t believe it either.  With one suspension for nudity and a near second one for sticking one of those floatation noodles in my pants and out my zipper, what can I say?  Sorry, but I can’t help my exhibitionism?

On paper and business cards I am an attorney, lawyer, counselor, esquire, (all could fall under jaded jerk)… whichever you prefer.  I don’t really think I’m either of those things, the jerk part, you can decide that on your own.  But yea, harder to believe than me graduating from a private high school.

I’ve been called persnickety and Gangsta Bohemian.


I find myself laughing, a lot.  Toeing randomness, often.  Embracing craziness, my life.

I’m a binge sleeper.  And I am a huge fan of Snuggies!  I absolutely love pillows.

I bleed University of Washington purple and gold.

I ALWAYS smell good.  Ask anyone, including your mom.

I try to live my life one shenanigous day and impromptu weekend at time.

I’m a fan of awkward situations.  Not really, but I handle them pretty well… that comes from too much experience.  I recognize all my ridiculousness.

I’ve been known to tear off a dance on the street… and basically anywhere else.

Are you dancing and smiling?

I use two spaces at the end of a sentence. Sometimes I don’t. I use commodious words in bitty sentences.

My favorite number is 2, sometimes 22 (that’s 2 twos, but I don’t like tutus). If I were an athlete, I’d rock the number 12 – Go Hawks!

I have poor grammar and use too much slang when I speak.

Hauntingly Beautiful“… is a great expression.

A great adjective is: “endearing”, and it may also justify certain nicknames.

I like hot sauce.  Please make it as spicy as possible.

I like garlic bread, and will return to Italy… again.

Brunch buffets are awesome.

I say hella, dude, bro, man, but I’m trying to say “lady” and “darlin’” more.  I’m trying to find ways to use “moded”… I’m also trying to bring back “Don’t have a cow man.” I like how my friend Meredith always uses “rad.”

I swear a bit more than I’d like to, but I can say floccinaucinihilipilification and pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis (Doug’s favorite word).  But if you’re a mothafucka, then you are.  I’m Filipino.

Airports are my favorite, where are you going?  Where are you from?  Most people at an airport have an idea of what they are doing.  Most people everywhere else, don’t.

I enjoy traveling, and apparently it is interested in me.  I appreciate listening to the stories of others as I try to write my own.

Yes, I make up characters that exchange dialogs in my head, and one day that’s what will let my family eat.

I don’t have imaginary friends.  Those who pretend to be mine probably won’t drink the champagne.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles… is there a better name for a cartoon?  Or title of anything for that matter?

Michelangelo, Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael

I find the word “funny,” funny, “funnier” not as funny, and “funniest” is pretty much normal.


Yellow is my favorite color.  Purple is my royal color.  Red is my lucky color.  But I don’t depend on luck, I’m just good.

I will give that shout-out I promised back in the day, believe me.

Wassily Kandinsky’s Composition IX

I enjoy saying “I love life,” because I often wonder does “life love love?” Well the real question should be, “Are you living?”

My first love broke my heart but we were young, I broke my hand for my second love.  Is the third time the charm?  Like how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop, the world may never know.

I like Tootsie Pops and really like Otter Pops for that matter.

If I say you’re beautiful, it’s because you are.  And I wonder why women seek compliments.  See the thing with girls (a generalization) is if you give them one, they question the validity.  Basically I don’t, won’t ever, and have no intentions on fully understanding the opposite sex… some things just need to be left a mystery.  A grand mystery it is.

“A man who pretends to understand women is bad manners. For him to really to understand them is bad morals.”Henry James

Hot is not sexy, sexy is not “I’d do her,” but Beautiful is best.  Sexy Beautiful is even better.

My favorite thing about a girl is her smile.  I’m a sucker for a short-haired girl with a pretty smile and yes you have to ideas… but fuck style.  Though if you’ve got it, I respect it.

I favor brunettes over blonds about 99.2% of the time, sorry.

If you have hazel or brown eyes, try not to look into mine too long or else I become mesmerized.  Though if we share a smile and our eyes are connected, color doesn’t matter and be warned.  Blue eyes make me think of what heaven should be like.

I like a bubble butt, yea I admit it.  But if you have a butt-face, your pants are too tight.

I hate girls that say, “What the fuck was that?” instead of saying, “Please explain yourself.”  Can I at least have one second? Damn.

The two sexes do sometimes communicate differently, but that’s okay.  It means one really isn’t better than the other, well it depends.

The welcoming rock at Las Caletas, Puerto Vallarta

I like walks on the beach, honestly.  I like longboarding along the beach better.  And if you sing that is word, even if it’s terrible… you’re singin’, and I’m bout it bout it.

The “one glasses,” a scarf, and a scent of Heart to dash my nose, forget about it.  If I was a snowman I’d melt.

Speaking of snowmen I prefer climates where I can see my breath (some of the time, not in April) and I can share an Eskimo Kiss.  Especially during the Holiday season.  A jacket should be a necessity not a fashion statement.

I like to rock argyle socks with shorts and a tie on any occasion.  I also like ankle black socks.

Sometimes this world can be cold and it’s nice to thaw out.  So there’s a place in Puerto Vallarta called Las Caletas that holds a place in my heart (find me at one of my two hidden hammocks).  Did I mention I own a part of Puerto Vallarta?

I like the rain and sun, night and day, but tend to prefer a myriad of stars in the sky instead of a giant one.

I embrace the freshness rain brings… and can listen to the rhythmic rain for endless hours.  Nature’s music is a cleansing breath for my soul.

Dudes that pose are scary, unless you pose for the Heisman.  But if you haven’t won it, how dare you, poser!

Girls that spit are scarier. Yet I’m addicted to spitting, so I hope not to get cancer.  Girls that fart are funny (yet too much and I get nauseous).  Girls that poop are honest.

I’m just a boy… though I’ll be your Panda.  But let’s face it, I’m a Toys Я Us Kid.


I’m not as flexible as I should be.  I need to stretch more.

People assume that I’m a Democrat and unspoken liberal.  Really?  We should sit down, talk, and work on understanding assumptions.  But then again that doesn’t mean I’m a grumpy conservative.

My pet peeves are those with pet peeves.  Ignorance is bliss, but ignorant people are a mess.  I debate, not argue.  But if your points have no sustenance, I get angry.  I stand by my beliefs, but I welcome challenges and am willing to change.

The word perpetuate can be used in a number of settings, but in debates I tend to forget the word and often substitute promotes, which quite frankly does not capture the essence of perpetuate.

Why don’t people squeeze from the correct end of a toothpaste tube?

Thanks to Ally I learned that, “It’s awareness, not frustration.”

I like headphones.  But I hate shutting myself out to the world.

LOL or WTF should never be used in a live conversation AT ALL!!! But HA! can make me horny.

I will never change my cell phone number or my e-mail address.

I’m not religious, but I have found myself in many a church.  I believe that sports can be a religion.  How many have prayed on Sunday?  The putt to fall or the field goal to split the uprights.

There are three things I know and am slightly obsessed with: inconsequential Trivial Pursuit questions and Jeopardy answers and sports… I have Bridgestone (J36) irons, Cleveland wedges (60 and 54 degree CG-14 Black Pearls) and woods (Hybrid Launcher, 3W Launcher), a Taylor Made (R9 460 TP) driver with stiff shafts, my putter is an Odyssey (White Ice Rossie)… Never judge a swimmer until you swim a mile (or practice) in his Speedo… Poker is not a sport, but I play it, and it’s not the size of the stack it’s all about when you raise it.

I used to drive a black Ford Ranger with dents and scratches.  I like boxing, especially in my truck… “Your truck is on fire!”  I now drive what is coined a “crossover SUV.”  Maggie calls it “The Computer Car.”  With Alexis’ help, I’ve named it Rudy.

I’m slightly above average at reading people in a very short time, but I am a great observer.  There is a difference.

Louis Vuitton cracks me up.  Lord Calvert tastes good with Coke.  Prince Albert cracks me up even more.  Prince is hella talented and don’t act like you haven’t moon-walked with the King of Pop.

I adore articulate alliterations.

I write poetry.  But don’t like to read my own as much.

Ink is like blood manifesting my pain and I’m not afraid to shed it.  Nor a tear.  Especially when I’m missing you.  Patience is a virtue, but a better song.

Some people say I’m a writer (not a good one).  What that really means is that I can bullshit well with ink and paper.  It’s the slacker’s route to millions.  Basically I’m chasing the words and dreams people refuse to hear or see, while manifesting them with life and my pen.

Let me enlighten you on TREALITY and allow me to share my slaow.

My material wishes are simple (yacht and underwater castle aside, though they’ll be had).  I’ll know I’ve made it once I have a full on Toto bathroom (washlet and ridiculous shower included) and a hammock room designed by Henry Hall.

Slurpees are one of the best food/drink products ever created.  You can add having a Slurpee machine to the “I’ll know I’ve made it” list.  Icees are NOT Slurpees, don’t be fooled.

Karol Wojtyła – Pope John Paul II

I call my mother “Moms,” my father “Pops,” but I address them as Mom and Dad.

I laugh when someone falls.  I cry when someone succeeds.

I miss my dogs Scruffy and Duey, R.I.P.

I know too many good people who have died.  I wonder where the bad girls go when they die.  And hope I’ll have a chance to pass gas one more time in front of those that pass before me and those I pass before.

I’m Catholic by upbringing, but follow the belief of Mutual Respect.

I kicked it with Pope John Paul II on New Year’s when I was in Kindergarten. And that’s the truth; in fact there’s a videotape of him carrying me while blessing my family and those around us inside the Vatican.  Everyone I’ve met since then has just been a bonus, but I’m grateful for all I’ve met along the way.  The good and the bad.  I’d say I’m lucky, some would say I’m blessed… but I dunno, I guess I’m just happy to be alive.



American Hero Pat Tillman

I’m working on being a Messenger like K’naan and J. Period in the likes of Bob Dylan, Bob Marley, and Fela Kuti.  I’m trying to embrace the eccentric minds of the Lost Generation and the conviction of The Ilustrados.

Mural of Jose Rizal at the Intramuros in Manila. A great man, great thinker, leader of a revolution in the Philippines and inspirational in Spain… It depicts him as he was executed by the Spaniards. They wanted to shoot him in the back, he refused and as they were about to shoot, he defiantly turned around and get shot in the chest… that’s G.

I’m interested in people who know who they are.  It can be draining trying to figure out or convince people to figure it out (only because I’m trying to figure it out for myself).  Though I’ll always lend an ear or a hug.

I fancy a girl that moves her lips when she talks.  You’d be amazed at how many don’t.  I’m on a quest for another elusive Ingrid BergmanMandy MooreRachel Leigh Cook hybrid.  Seriously, I met one once.

I’d like to meet all my dead relatives.  Jesus for dinner, or a late supper with some wine and bread.  Pope John Paul II, again, so we can discuss something.  A Blionphin (bear, lion, dolphin).  Anyone that can carry a conversation that I have not created in a screenplay or book already. (Not that I’m all knowing, but good conversations are hard to come by).

One day I’ll be kickin it with a monkey in a midget costume lighting my hookah and topping off my cocktails (or a midget in a monkey suit, which ever I’m lucky enough to own, I mean encounter) and of course they can join in.


“When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest.” Henry David Thoreau

My theme song is Joe Walsh’sLife’s Been Good.” “Something” by The Beatles is the greatest love song of all time! My favorite Beatles songs are… actually every Beatles song is a great song.  If you don’t have a favorite Beatles song, then you don’t like music.  I’ve sung Air Supply on multiple occasions and if I were on American Idol my final song (because I would make it to the final two) would be “Drift Away”, Dobie Gray style.  If you listen to The Cars while drinking, you’re about to be or are already fucked up.

I like rap, iffy about hip-hop, a song isn’t one without an intro and solo, classical music kicks ass and thus so does metal, classic rock is perfect for any situation, I like punk, monster ballads are sweet, and my first house was next to a farm so I can stand country.

For memories, I’ll play “Years Ago” by SuperDeluxe on my guitar.

George, John, Paul, Ringo and Clapton: The Fab Four Plus One.

The Greatest Band Ever

Any time a member of my family grabs a mic, it’s pretty solid times.

I drop proppers for Joshua Wade Hickman, the filthiest, most grimiest classical metal emo hardcore rap guitarist out there; who now apparently plays bass.

And of course Swamp Water Explosion, Et. Al (SWEEt Al).

“For the first time, he heard something that he knew to be music. He heard people singing. Behind him, across vast distances of space and time, from the place he had left, he thought he heard music too. But perhaps, it was only an echo.The Giver by Lois Lowry


After the law school experiment and after passing the Bar, I like to read again.

The Alchemist, a solid read

I believe Plato made Socrates look smart. I also believe that Nietzsche is misunderstood, he’s just a crazy guy with too many ideas. I can relate. Yes I realize I just dropped Plato in the same paragraph as Nietzsche, and yes I realize Nietzsche rejected Platonism. But it’s a Panda Paradox and the waters I swim in.

Thus Spoke Zarathustra, El Filibusterismo,  The Prophet, Noli Me Tangere, The Alchemist (actually anything by Paulo Coelho),  An Imperfect Life, The Dialogues of Plato, The Tao of Wu, Crime and Punishment, Three Cups of Tea, Love in the Time of Cholera, Geek Love, Don Quixote, The Royal Road to Romance,  St. Augustine’s Confessions,  Brave New World, The Little Prince, The Giver, Shadow Over Mousehaven Manor, A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, The Berenstain Bears, The Great Gatsby, The Boxcar Children, Forrest Gump, The Alphabet of Manliness, Identity (Milan Kundera), Postethnic America (fuck categorizations), DinotopiaBret Easton Ellis works.

“When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.” The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

“Your reason and your passion are the rudder and the sails of your seafaring soul. If either your sails or your rudder be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas. For reason, ruling alone, is a force confining; and passion, unattended, is a flame that burns to its own destruction. Therefore let your soul exalt your reason to the height of passion, that it may sing; And let it direct your passion with reason, that your passion may live through its own daily resurrection, and like the phoenix rise above its own ashes.”The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

Did you know? That Mad Season’s song “River of Deceit” references Kahlil Gibran’s “The Prophet” in these lyrics: “My pain is self-chosen / at least, so The Prophet says…

SOME OF MY FAVORITE MOVIES (With links to Official Websites and Choice Scenes worth checking out):

The Other Man: Forrest Gump

FORREST GUMP, Casablanca, Inception, Across the Universe, ImagineNowhere Boy, Simon Birch, Waking Life, What Dreams May Come, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Once, Serendipity, Dopamine, Singles, Wristcutters: A Love Story, Stranger than Fiction, Stay, The Motorcycle Diaries, The Boondock Saints, Snatch, Finding Forrester, Stand By Me, Good Will Hunting, The Lion King, Almost Famous, Kill Bill, The Warriors, August Rush, The Goonies, The Sandlot, 300, ONE: The Movie, Pulp Fiction, Before Sunrise, Garden State, Before Sunset, The Last Kiss, Lila dit ça (Lila Says), High Fidelity, The Rules of Attraction, Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels, Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down, Walk the Line, Happiness, Moulin Rouge!, Baz Luhrmann’s: Romeo + Juliet, Shakespeare in Love, Love the Hard Way, The March of the Penguins, Conversations With Other Women, The Wizard, 25th Hour, The Departed, The Beach, Gummo, Harold and Kumar: Go to White Castle and Escape from Guantanamo Bay Bay, El Mariachi, Grizzly Man, Sol Goode, Rounders, Sin City, Two Girls and a Guy, The Fox and the Hound, All Dogs Go to Heaven, The Land Before Time, The Paper Chase, and Wassup Rockers.

Dazed and Confused reminds me of back in the day with my boys rollin in our trucks with the soundtrack blastin’.

The OHP’s Strange Brew Anthology, Vol. 1 is somewhere on the bottom of Whistle Lake.

If a movie makes you think, that’s the movie for me.  I’m a sucker for cheezy romance movies and coming of age tales.

The Man Rick Blaine (Humphrey Bogart) in Casablanca

I watch movies all about the same thing (human interactions), sometimes different things.

I could watch Forrest Gump and Casablanca over and over again.  Actually probably both Harold and Kumar’s also.

Among the handful of times I’ve seen the movie Dopamine I’ve always thought it was, well, dope.

Rand: Now my question is, does the chemical make-up between two human mammals make our personal involvement a moot point?

Sarah: Of course it’s all chemical to start with. It’s all just signals to communicate with these bodies we live in. But true love is incredible… all consuming.

Rand: No I totally agree all consuming. But, so is lust. I mean is it possibly rooted in physiology rather than… our hearts?

SOME OF MY FAVORITE TV SHOWS (theme songs/intros/websites):

The OG Iron Chefs (Japan)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (old school, new school is lame), 24 (preferably on DVD entire seasons straight through), JEOPARDY!, The Wonder Years, SportsCenter, The Iron Chef (Asian version), Entourage, American Gladiators (also old school), Dexter, Duel, Sea Quest DSV, South Park, The Gem Channel, Dance 360, Pants-Off Dance-Off, American Idol (I don’t judge you on what you watch).

Is the NFL on? I appreciate “The classic thinking person’s answer-and-question quiz.” I’ll watch pretty much anything on the Travel Network.  I’m a fan of Zane Lamprey and Samantha Brown, trying to figure out how to nab their jobs.  I’d take down Adam Richman on any food challenge, I’ve eaten worse than Andrew Zimmern, and Anthony Bourdain keeps it real but seems like a stiff to me.

Commercials tend to be more creative than actual television programming.


Did I mention I’m a quote fiend?

Faced with today’s problems and disappointments, many people will try to escape from their responsibility… I propose to you the option of love, which is the opposite of escape.Pope John Paul II

Karol Wojtyła – Pope John Paul II

For what does it profit a man to gain the world and lose his soul? – Jesus

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?…It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.Marianne Williamson

Life is a delicate negotiation

The Bravest are surely those who have the clearest vision of what is before them, Glory and Danger alike, and yet not withstanding go over to meet it.Thucydides

The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night.Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

You need not leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. You need not even listen, simply wait, just learn to become quiet, still, and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you and be unmasked. It has no choice; it will roll in ecstasy at your feet.Franz Kafka

If you look into your own heart, you find nothing wrong there, what is there to fear? – Confucius

To understand the heart and mind of a person, look not at what he has already achieved, but at what he aspires to do. – Kahlil Gibran

In human life there is constant change of fortune; and it is unreasonable to expect an exemption from the common fate. Life itself decays, and all things are changing daily.Plutarch

You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.Friedrich Nietzsche

The stars created eyes so they could see themselves.Deepak Chopra

Give thanks for sorrow that teaches you pity; for pain that teaches you courage – and give exceeding thanks for the mystery which remains a mystery still – the veil that hides you from the infinite, which makes it possible for you to believe in what you cannot see.Robert Nathan

The only success worth one’s powder was success in the line of one’s idiosyncrasy… what was talent but the art of being completely whatever one happened to be?Henry James

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.Mark Twain

If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth the writing.Benjamin Franklin

On matters of style, swim with the current, on matters of principle, stand like a rock.Thomas Jefferson

We are each an angel with only one wing. And we can only fly while embracing each other.Luciano De Crescenzo

Hold on to your dreams for if dreams die life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly.Langston Hughes

Hasta la Victoria Siempre.Che Guevara

A hidden connection is stronger than an obvious one.Heraclitus

True religion is the life we lead, not the creed we profess. – Louis Nizer

I believe that the familiar must move toward the fantastic. – Nick Cave

Poena Par Sapientia


One response to “Who Is The Penning Panda?

  1. Merely a smiling visitor here to share the love (:, btw outstanding layout.

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